Nurse recalls making people die alone

I was a nurse back in 2020– during the pandemic.

At first, I was scared and overwhelmed about an unknown virus coming from China. Nobody knew anything about it.

But something began to not “add up” when I heard politicians telling everyone to social distance but then saw them on the news and social media hanging out with their friends— without masks and with no social distancing.

I’m not trying to get political here. I’m just telling you that t didn’t make sense. None of it.

I pushed it aside, thinking that they might know something I didn’t know…

About halfway through the year, I had a patient who was dying. Due to the rules these politicians mandated— rules for us but not them— I couldn’t let family members go say “goodbye” to patients who were on their deathbed and in their final moments. Those precious people were forced to die alone in a hospital room, rather than holding the hands of their loved ones and hearing their farewell words of encouragement and honor.

I was pissed.

After a few more months I began to notice other patterns. The protocol often required us to intubate patients, but I knew that I soon as we did— due to the issues with Covid— it was almost guaranteed they would die.

It was too much…

•  Making people die alone.
•  Doing procedures that seemed to make them die faster.
•  Not even being able to ask a question.

I eventually quit. I felt guilty about all of it. It wasn’t worth it.